The Brats meet the Insane
by sleepingbueaty
Summary: The survivors of the Holy War go to Hogwarts to teach! Separated!NeahxAllen, Yullen, Laven, Poker Pair. Frieandship!RoadxAllen. Allen is the uke. Rated T for cussing. Yaoi, don't like don't read. Rating may change. Reviews help me write faster. Renamed. Previously called Hogwarts meets D. GrayMan. It gets better after the first two chapters. REWRITTEN!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

Narrator POV

It started out as your average day. Okay, your average day if you're Allen. So yeah. An average day for Allen. I dare you to say that three times really fast without stopping. Allen did. He failed. So his ,Allen, average day was waking up, eating an insane amount of food, arguing with Kanda, playing poker with Tyki, plotting with Road and Neah, and joking around with Lavi. But then Allen's average day turned not so average. In other words he got a visitor. Now, you have to understand that the six survivors of the Holy War never, ever, EVER got visitors. EVER. Hell, the only friends they had were either dead, in prison, a meanie, or the headmaster of a school named after a pig and a facial annoyance. So, naturally, they went investigate. Whom did they find? Dumbledore, that's whom. In other words the headmaster of a school named after a pig and a facial annoyance.

"...Someone actually visited us. I think...the end of the world is coming." Lavi spoke in shock. Kanda promptly whacked him on the head. Ouch. That's gonna leave a bruise.

"So...why did you decide to bless us with your presence? You usually send Faux. Must be important. For you to actually show up, that is." Tyki stated pleasantly. You could hear the venom in his voice. Bitter much?

"I want you to teach at Hogwarts." Oh, okay. Wait, WHAT?!

"You want us to what?" Asked a skeptical Kanda. Can you blame him? "I want you and the rest of survivors of the Holy War to come teach at Hogwarts." Responded a cheerful Dumbledore. Like it was every day he came and proposed a teaching positioned to the very six people who are the last beings on _earth_, you want teaching your children. "Why?" Asked the ever curious Lavi. But then who wouldn't be curious?

"Because you all are experienced fighters that I believe will sufficiently protect my school from Voldemort. I believe I've already sent you a letter explaining everything, yes?" They nodded. "Besides the Ministry can't interfere with your coming to Hogwarts simply because who you are. And Voldemort is back whether Fudge believes so or not. You have already agreed to help me, so come and teach. Please." Dumbledore explained. He knew the risks. The survivors weren't exactly what you would call sane. And even though they had control over their blood lust there was a chance that it could get out of control. So the survivors knew he, without a doubt, was completely serious. Oh, shit.

"If we agree...what would we be teaching exactly?" Allen spoke cautiously.

"One class that taught both the history of the Holy War and Muggle Defense."

"…Well… I don't see any harm in it. Besides the kids' mental state when we're done teaching. What about you guys?" questioned Allen. Rather blunt isn't he? He looked at the only other survivors who were Neah **(A.N. He's separated from Allen in this fic.)**, Tyki, Kanda, Road, and lastly, all seem to communicate with each other silently.

"We're okay with it. On one condition. We get to torment the brats and the teachers to our hearts content." Neah spoke for all of them. "I agree to your terms. Just don't go over board. And I was all so wondering if you would join the Order of Phoenix?"

"No, we don't want to be personally involved. We're only going to Hogwarts because you are one of our only friends. Period. Its pretty sad." Lavi admitted.

"Yeah. So we'll come when school starts. Agreed?" Allen asked.

"Agreed."

And so the deal was sealed. Hogwarts was going to have a very interesting year. Especially a certain dark haired fifth year.

* * *

**So, what do y'all think? This is the rewritten version and I must say I am proud. I decided to put Road in here 'cause she's awesome. Also, only one person said if they wanted a fivesome or not. And no one has entered the poll. I don't mean to whine but, you might not like outcome if you don't vote. Well, I don't own anything.  
**

**-Sleepy  
**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Harry POV

Silence. That's all you could hear. A pin could- okay you get it.

Anyway, the silence was all because the diamonds. The bright white diamonds that had appeared out of nowhere. Now there was a huge diamond shaped doorway. Now Harry had seen a lot of things in his life. He had fought dragons, a baskilsk, ran away from huge ! #$%^&* spiders, and fought Voldemort. You'd think he'd stop being surprised. That wasn't the case.

'What the f-' Suddenly someone stepped out of the diamond.

His appearance was shocking to say the least. He had bright white hair that was in a pony tail at the base of his neck and beautiful silver eyes. His skin was a mere shades darker than his hair. All in all he looked like an angel. But his angelic face was marred by a strange looking scar(maybe a tattoo?). A upside down pentacle traced a line from forehead to chin. Sitting on his shoulders was a strange blue-haired doll.

After him came a handsome looking male with glittering gold eyes and black spiky hair. He had a smile that practically screamed insanity.

Next came some who could be his twin but with curlier hair and a beauty mark.

Finally the last two entered and the diamond/door/thingie disappeared. One of them had bright red hair, brighter than the Weasleys', which was held up by a black hair band, a eye patch, and a single green eye.

The other one had blue/black hair and a glare that made Snape's seem like the puppy dog eyes. That's some scary ! #$%^&*. He also seemed to have a sword strapped to his side. Is that safe?

"Albus! Sorry we're late. We got lost.(More like you got us lost, ! #$%^&* Moyashi.) Nice to see you again. Are we too late?" asked the white-haired boy.

"Glad you could make it. And, no you aren't late. Everyone these are your new teachers, who are going to teach you all subjects never taught before at Hogwarts. May present to you...the survivors of the Holy War." Hermione gasped.

"A-amazing..."

"Whatchew talking 'bout 'Mione?" Ron whispered conspiratorially.

"Survivors...but...that's impossible. They went missing and no one could find them. They're not even wizards...probably stronger...immortal..."

"Hermione? What do you mean?" Harry asked urgently.

"I'll tell you all later. Look, they're introducing themselves."

"I am Allen Walker. This is Neah Walker and the one besides him is Tyki Mikk. To my right is Lavi Bookman and Kanda Yuu. Call him Kanda. On my shoulder is Road Camelot." Allen gestured to each of them in turn. Everyone gasped as he mentioned the doll. A few actually screamed when the strange doll talked.

"Hello! None of you better get close to MY Allen!"

"Road..."

"Sorry Allen..."

"Now that they have introduced themselves... These people will be teaching you History of the Holy War and Muggle Defense. Now before they sit down... A warning. Don't give your new teachers a reason to dislike you in any way. No one is able to control them, but themselves."

Whispers exploded after Dumbledore finished. They were all amazed. The Headmaster couldn't control them? The Ministry? Hell going on here?

The survivors sat down...but not before they all smirked. Those who saw shivered. And so the feast began. Except for one Dolores Umbridge. Frozen to her seat she didn't dare move. She was terrified. The survivors of the Holy War. She only snapped out of her daze to go back to her office. When she went to sleep she was still shaking.

* * *

Neah POV

"Shut up, Lavi I'm not that short!" yelled Allen.

"No use denying it, Shounen. Your short." Tyki smirked. ! #$%^&* that smirk!

"Tyki is right. Your short, my cute nephew. Right Kanda?" Kanda nodded.

Allen sulked.

"Stop sulking my dear one. It makes me sad. So cheer up. Think about tomorrow. We are all going to have fun with the kiddies."

Neah watched as his (adorable)nephew curled up on the bed of the room they were in. It was a nice room, elegant and cozy at the same time. It was in the shape of a circle with a single bed, that Allen and Road were currently laying on, one already asleep the other close. The bed was for all of them, per request of Tyki. The bed itself was large and decorated with black and white. Gold lined it. There was a carpet large and round that covered almost everything. One huge window located to the right of the door and left of the bed. Right across from the huge window was a elegant fire place with flames dancing merrily as if celebrating the arrival of the survivors. There was a wardrobe and a mirror but that was it. Except for the 2 doorways, located in the wardrobe, that led too the bathroom(where Kanda and Tyki were in, for some reason at the same time) and the personal library where Lavi was.

Neah sighed. That was all dandy but what were they going to do about that disturbance he was sensing? He was the Noah of Time so he sensed some time being tampered with a couple years before. And that...was not good. He was a 'being of time' you could say so him finding out what happened deeming it 'troubling' or not was essential for the one or ones that caused the disturbance. If he found it 'troubling' bye-bye goes the cause. Simple.

And with those oh-so-happy thoughts the Nosh joined his (cute!)nephew and sister. Off to dreamland he went.

* * *

No one POV

Harry stared at Hermione in shock. '_What? No. NO! This couldn't-why-'_ Harry's thought were all jumbled and incomprehensible. This was bad. "Why would Dumbledore do this? He's mad! The survivors are- Why?" Harry stuttered.

"Mates this..." Ron trailed off.

"Is dangerous..." Hermione finished.

"Merlin's pants..." Harry breathed out.

They had all just found out that the survivor weren't human, killed, and were, quite possibly, as dangerous as Voldemort. They all thought the same thing:

_'What has Dumbledore done?'_

* * *

**I'm sorry for the wait, but unfortunately my dear school thinks that we could all use a couple projects all at the same time. Not to mention huge- ! #$%^&* tests. ! #$%^&*. Anyway I would like to inform you that I love all of you. And I'm pretty sure you all hate me with a passion. Guess it's a love-hate relationship. I hope we can work on that. Now...does anyone have an idea of the way to die if you're immortal? I already have a couple of ideas but you guys probably have better ones. So please...tell me. Oh and current fivesome is winning. Though I'm thinking about creating a fivesome later with Road as the match maker. **

**What d'you think? Well tell me in reviews and if you have a big idea PM. If you're a guest and can't PM just review.  
**

**See you later, Alligators~  
**

**~Sleepy  
**


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